


Body and Mind (and Demons in Both)

by Mochapup12



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Cole just wants to help, also there are swords, fenris doesn't understand him, fenris just needs a hug tbh, mentions of tragic past, varric won't stop adopting cute murder children
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-30
Updated: 2018-03-30
Packaged: 2019-04-14 19:26:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,495
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14142924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mochapup12/pseuds/Mochapup12
Summary: Someone probably should have warned Fenris about the mind-reading probably-not-a-demon before he came to Skyhold.Or, Fenris wants a moment alone on the battlements.  Instead, he meets Cole, who tries to help him.  This goes about as well as you might expect.





	Body and Mind (and Demons in Both)

**Author's Note:**

> this was supposed to be a drabble what happened

“You’re hurting.”  The voice startles Fenris, and he whips around to find the speaker - he’d thought that he was alone up on the battlements.  So much for a moment of peace.

 

A pale boy sits on the ledge in the shadow of a watchtower, a wide-brimmed hat hiding his face.  He doesn’t look up at Fenris, instead staring out at the mountains and kicking his feet absently.  He seems unconcerned about the dizzying height, nothing but air below him all the way down to the mountainside.  It looks like it’s miles below them from here.

 

“Excuse me?” he says flatly.  The boy turns, presumably to look at him, but his eyes are still hidden by the brim of his hat.

 

“Pain, white-hot, flowing and cracking and breaking, rushing through veins that aren’t real.  Dulled with time, yes, but still there, throbbing and aching when exhaustion makes it impossible to ignore.  Always there, like a sickly second heart, discomfort every time it beats.  But that’s only on the surface.  The skin can be ignored.  The mind is worse.  Better than some think, maybe, but if you don’t keep moving all of it catches up, magic and anger and fear and hurt.  You are afraid that you’ll never learn how to not be hunted, even now, so many years later and so many dead, even...”  A pause, then he asks, “Who’s Danarius?”  His tone is innocent, but even now the question makes Fenris’s blood run cold.

 

The boy stops, blinks, and lifts his head slightly so that he can fix Fenris with a curious gaze, eyes gentle and a blue that’s almost too pale.  He seems unaware of the effect that he’s had.  Fenris is frozen in place with shock, his mind reeling from the onslaught of information and the raw, uncomfortable feeling of vulnerability it brings.  This boy is just… sitting there, staring at Fenris like he hasn’t just torn through every wall he’s ever built within seconds.

 

Fenris reaches for the hilt of his sword, strapped across his back.  Unsheathing it, he levels the point at the boy and pretends he can’t see the way that it trembles.

 

“What are you?” he snarls.  No way this… thing could be human.  No one could have known all of that, especially not someone that he’s positive he’s never seen before.  Not even Hawke can read him this well, and he’s told her more than anyone else.  “Are you a demon?”

 

The boy raises his hands like he’s trying to placate Fenris.

 

“No.  Well, maybe.  I’m not sure anymore, but I don’t think so.  At least, it’s not the way that you think.”  He stands carefully, hopping down from the edge and seeming remarkably unconcerned about the sword pointed at him.  “I upset you, didn’t I?  I’m sorry.  I was trying to help.  Sometimes what would help the most hurts the most to hear.  Varric says I should listen more first and try not to say things out loud that are mixed up with too many emotions, but I’m not very good at it yet.”

 

Fenris just stares at him, utterly bewildered.  This thing knows Varric?  He’s unsure how to respond - demons are never to be trusted, that much he knows, but he’s never encountered one that didn’t attack him on sight or try to trick him into serving it.  For that matter, he’s never seen one that looks like a human boy before either.  Whatever he is, he seems genuinely benevolent, but Fenris knows as well as anyone that looks can be deceiving.

 

“You did not answer my first question.  What are you?”  he demands.

“I’m Cole.  And I’m a person - well, mostly, anyway.  I was less of one before, but Varric is helping.  I help people too, or at least I try to.  It’s harder now that they don’t forget me.  I can’t start over if I get it wrong.  Like with you.” he answers, clarifying absolutely nothing.

 

Fenris grits his teeth, moments away from just attacking and being done with it.  He’s dimly aware of the buzzing ache as his lyrium brands flare to life, triggered by his agitation.  Cole takes a step back, eyes widening slightly at the sight.  He opens his mouth like he’s about to say something else, only to be interrupted by a new voice from the other end of the walkway.

 

“Well, it’s good to see that you two are playing nice.”  Varric says, walking over to stand next to Fenris.  Cole smiles and gives him a little wave.  Varric nods at him, then turns to face Fenris.  “I see you’ve met Cole.  Don’t worry, he’s fine, but he does have this effect on people sometimes.  His whole mind-reading thing can really freak you out at first.”  he says.  Fenris lets the point of his sword drop towards the ground, the lyrium glow fading.

 

“I didn’t mean to.”  Cole says in a small voice.  Varric sighs.

 

“I know you didn’t, kid.  It’s okay, you just brought up some heavy stuff.  Maybe add ‘traumatic history’ to your list of things to not mention to people.”  Cole frowns, but nods.

 

“Varric.  What is he?”  Fenris asks, tone still sharp.  Varric lets out a laugh.

 

“You know, that’s a damn good question.  He’s definitely a special case, but he’s no demon.  Short version, he was a spirit of compassion but had a human form, and all he really wants to do is help people.  He could make people forget him or even just not see him at all, but he’s more human now and the adjustment period for not being able to do that anymore has been... interesting, to say the least.   He learns now, remembers things and grows from them, but there’s still a lot that he doesn’t always understand.  He’s basically human, as far as we can tell.”  he says.  Fenris raises an eyebrow.

 

“That is not particularly helpful, you know,”  he says.  “I will take your word for it that he isn’t dangerous, but I do not trust him.  Spirits and demons are not so different from one another.”  Varric shrugs.

 

“Well, to be fair, you don’t really trust anyone, Broody.” he says.  Fenris rolls his eyes, but doesn’t say anything - Varric isn’t exactly wrong.  The list of people that he’s absolutely certain that he trusts numbers exactly two - himself and Hawke.

 

“I have to admit, I am curious as to how and why you seem to have adopted a… not-demon.  Was a blood mage not enough?”  Fenris asks, finally sheathing his sword.

 

“Who, Daisy?  Ah, she’s a sweetheart and you know it.  A little misguided sometimes, maybe, but she’s never anything but kind.”  He pauses, like something has only just occurred to him.  “Huh.  I guess this is becoming a trend.  Well, what can I say, I have a heart of gold and a weakness for wayward but sweet misfits.”  Fenris sighs, and Varric grins at him.  “Alright, tell you what.  Let’s head down to the tavern and you can drink away whatever he brought up that you don’t want to deal with, and I’ll explain it all in a little more detail.  Or, if you’d prefer, I can catch you up on some of the adventures the Inquisition has gotten up to - did you know that I actually went to an Orlesian ball?”

 

“I don’t believe I even need to hear the details of it to know that it was horrible.”

 

“Oh, it was fascinating.  The assassination plot was the best part, though.  Really brought the night to life, the perfect finale to an evening of watching nobles gossip and try to deceive each other in every way possible.”

 

“Yes, that viper’s pit of duplicity does sound like the sort of thing that you would enjoy.”  Fenris says, deadpan.  Varric laughs, turning towards the stairs down to the courtyard and motioning over his shoulder for Fenris to follow.

 

“Just you wait, Broody, I’ve got better stories than that.  Remind me to tell you about the time I went to the Hissing Wastes with the Inquisitor.  I thought I’d be shaking sand out of my boots for months.”

 

~

 

The two of them make their way down the stairs as Cole watches from his perch on the wall lining the battlements.  A slight smile hovers on his face, eyes fixed on Fenris’s back.

 

“Pain, always present, always dark and hard and angry.  But sometimes less.  He won’t admit it, but friends make him softer.  He wants to be softer.  Maybe someday he will be.” he whispers to himself.  Looking back out at the mountain range stretching into the distance, he lets his feet swing through the air, heels tapping gently against the stone.  He wishes that he could help more, but along with everything else that he’s learned has come the realization that sometimes he can’t be the one to soothe.  He finds himself hoping that Varric can help this time, then shakes his head, still smiling.  He already has.

**Author's Note:**

> opening soon: varric tethras's home for wayward misfits
> 
> thanks for reading, this got a little bit away from me but i had a lot of fun writing it bc the character dynamic between fenris and cole is one that i'd never really considered before but has a Lot of potential  
> (also they're my two favorite characters in the franchise whoops)
> 
> my dragon age sideblog is @shadow-kid-cole on tumblr, i post little drabbles there sometimes and i'm always looking for new mutuals that'll listen to me cry over my favs
> 
> thanks again for reading this silly little thing, i hope you liked it! comments are always welcome!


End file.
